The Stench of the Past

When we moved to 7th st, from where I am not sure whether it was 21st st or staying at someones house. There was a school which was in walking distance of the house. We attempted to get enrolled there yet this was during the overcrowding of the schools in Philly. So we had to be bused from that school to a school in the suburbs called Ziegler. Now this was a school which was predominantly white, so I coming from a all black environment to a environment that black didn't exist. Meaning there was no cultural diversity, when we showed up. Now we took a bus to this school, I only remember two black faces on that bus and that was mine and Keya. I say this to give a background, and only a background. We had white people coming to our house to get drugs, and we were bused to a white school. Walking into that class on that first day of school for us, was hard. It was the middle of the school year so just being the new kid in the middle of the year was strike one. Strike two was being black in a all white school. Strike three was being poor. You got a new kid, being black, and being poor.......3 strikes and we were out. There are so many stories, mostly suppressed. I want to deal with one that was extremely difficult to live and to relive.

I am the truck supervisor @ Kohl's department store. I got a crew of ten guys. 3 blacks, 3 white, and 4 mexicans. I mention race because it plays such a dynamic force in our lives not always negative. Out of my 3 black guys there are two brothers one 20yo and the other 19yo. These brothers are big one wears a 17 the other wears a 16 shoe. For the most part they are good workers, not a lot of speed but they will go where they are sent, they show up for work, well-mannered, and they listen. For the most part ideal workers. There is a problem though. They stink. They smell absolutely horrible. Hold your breath horrible. We tried to ignore it, impossible. I addressed it a couple times in a group meeting saying stuff like we all work hard and I know we sweat yet we must take care of our hygiene. I did this twice, no change. I got called in the office (something about me in the office). My boss told me that there has been some complaints, that people don't even want to come to the dock, she told me that I need to address it. I told her that I would. That's when Jesus stepped right in, I have God to help me deal with some of the wounds from my past, oh he has done this.

One day at Ziegler, I was sitting in class when the teacher in the class, began asking me questions about my home life. One of the many rules my parents had was what goes on in the house stays in the house. Me answering these questions would have been a major violation. So I didn't answer the way I should have, if i would have told this teacher what was taking place in our home things would have been different. In hindsight this was pivotal. The teacher was frustrated and it shone in his tone and his actions. He began to ridicule me, talking about my clothing and my smell. See this comes on the heels of, at my last school the teachers were trying to promote me to the next grade. Now I have this teacher telling that I stink, and that I need to bath. What do you think takes place in my already fragile psyche, Rebellion!!!!! From then on out i never gave school my all. I did this all throughout school this mentality did not stop it progressed until graduation. That's not the half while ridiculing me this teacher told me get out and he escorted me to the bathroom where he had me wash up the hand soap and those abrasive, hard, soggy when they are wet brown towels. I hate to take my clothes of in front of this man, wash my body and have him escort me back to class then minute I walk in the laughter begins. So many if my struggles lay within this one day, struggles with, authority, school, bullies, and white men. Yet I serve a mighty God, who forgives so I forgive.

There are so many things that take me back to places I have long tried to forget or suppress. A song, a color a holiday it could be anything even a smell. The brother with their awful smell, I had to address this, I had to do it such a away that they didn't feel like me, you feel me. It had to be done with care, it had to be done with love, it had to be done the way that Teacher should have done it. I struggled with this I went back and fourth on how, or if I even should address it. My boss told me that if I didn't do it they would. I don't trust them to handle it the way it needed to be handle.

After our shift last night, while everyone was trying to clock out. The time clock is placed in this little hallway. You have ten guys trying to clock out in this little hallway the smell was so bad that I almost gagged. When the left the hallway the odor stayed. So anyone who walked in after we left was slapped with funk. I had to say something, I called them into the break room and told them how wonderful a job they do, followed I need them to do me a favor and focus a little more..........their hygiene. They didn't get upset, they said they would do it, and that they understood. Look at Jesus, you got to see Jesus in all that!!!!!!